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At some point you have to admit either that pearls are not worth as much to you as you claimed they were, or that you are kind of fine with pigs having them, really—otherwise, stop with the casting of the one, and the complaining about the other.

And just how old is this metaphor anyway?

Has there really been a years long feud between farmers and jewelers—or divers, for that matter? Do oysters have it in for swine? What the hell is going on exactly with the bivalve/porcine relationship in the 21st century? I think I’ll have a bowl of clam chowder with bacon bits and think about it.

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